Practical Tips to Help You Parent with Ability – Guest Post by Ashley Taylor
If you are an adult with a disability, you know that life is often harder for you than for some other people. You’ve most likely had to overcome obstacles in your life that few others have. As a result, you have been preparing your whole life for the difficulties that can occur in raising your first child. Even so, there are some things you should know as a parent with a disability that may help make your task a bit easier.
- If you use a wheelchair, you’re going to want an adaptive stroller. There’s no reason that being out and about with your baby should be hard. Modern adaptive stroller solutions allow you to attach the baby carrier to the front of your chair. More adaptive products that might be able to help you include breastfeeding slings, special nursing pillows, wiggle-proof changing tables, and adaptive baby monitors (for those with hearing disabilities). These products empower parents to live and child rear without restrictions.
- Depending on your disability, you may need some home modifications. What types of modifications and their scale obviously depends on the type and severity of your disability, but very few people with disabilities will be able to parent without some changes to their home life and structure.
- The three biggest areas of home modification you should focus on are your bedroom, bathrooms and kitchen. This is where childcare is especially difficult when you have a physical disability — when you’re washing your child and getting them in and out of their crib, for instance.
- Some of the best modifications for home safety include non-slip flooring, grab bars and handrails, and improved lighting solutions. For those in the USA, you may be able to apply for grants and/or get other assistance from your state government.
- Before you buy a crib, stroller, or any other adaptive (or standard) baby gear/equipment, make sure you check online reviews for the best products you can find. There are a lot of child accessories on the market, and when there are a lot of something, that means there are a lot of poor-quality options. You want to look for those products that have passed safety standards and are recommended by professionals.
- You need to start figuring out what sorts of activities you and your child can enjoy together. Your baby won’t be a baby for as long as you think, and having the means, knowledge, and equipment to entertain a mobile child (games, exercise, sports, puzzles, etc.) is vital. As someone with a disability, you’ll need more time to figure out how to do this on a daily basis. That’s why the prep begins now.
- There are a lot of resources online to help you with all facets of raising your first child, including prepping your home, taking steps to alter your lifestyle, caring for a newborn, and much more. A few examples include: Parents with Disabilities Online, Through the Looking Glass (for families with any disabled members), and the Disabled Parenting Project.
- Know your legal rights. Hopefully, you won’t be put in a position where you’ll need to assert them — but knowing what they are is important. You will need to find out about the disability act for the country where you live as well as disability rights.
- You are doing a good job. Being a new parent is hard for anyone, and it’s easy to feel like you’re not doing all you can for your child. You must remember to not be so hard on yourself. You’re doing great.
- While it’s important to be realistic about your disability and how it will inevitably affect the way you parent your child, it’s just as important to not just assume that you’ll be limited. With the help of adaptive products, home modifications, and the know-how you gain from mental preparation, you will be parenting with plenty of ability.
Disclaimer:
For the most effective outcome for you and your baby, seek the guidance of a professional, licensed occupational therapist. Your OT will assist you with all of the points listed above and may have further suggestions for you.
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About the Author: Ashley Taylor has severe scoliosis and her husband has a spinal cord injury and uses a wheelchair. She created DisabledParents.org to provide information and resources for other parents with disabilities.