There is something special about having contact with an older relative! When a relative lives to be a little over 100, there is certainly much to gain! I had the privilege of visiting my great-great-uncle when he was 97. I spent time with him again at 99 years as he prepared for his hundredth birthday. These two visits made a very great impression on me, including gaining a number of invaluable lessons.
Lesson 1: The Power of Positive Thinking
More and more we hear of the importance of thinking positively. My great-uncle was a living example of this. He knew well what the potential benefit would offer him, especially as it related to one’s health.
When my uncle was 97, he accompanied his son and daughter-in-law to visit us in South Africa. He would have to travel by air from the USA. Not everyone lives to their nineties and certainly not in good health. There was something quite remarkable about my great-uncle. When visiting him for the first time in their holiday apartment, I sat next to him. He was sprightly, alert and eager to participate in any outing or family get-together that we had in mind. He was of sound mind, walked independently, and was all together a pleasure to converse with! What struck me as intriguing was not only that he was in very good health at the age of 97, but his son and daughter-in-law had picked up flu on the flight, while he had not.
Eager to find out what his secret was, I turned to him and asked:
“Uncle Joe, don’t you ever get ill?”
“Oh yes,” he replied with a grin.
I relaxed and asked, “When was the last time you were ill?”
“Oh, I can clearly remember that day,” he said, “It was in the year (he named a year close to 80 years prior to our speaking) “I was on the ship coming from Wales to South Africa and I was concerned about the family I had left behind.”
“That’s amazing!” I replied. “What is your secret to maintaining such good health? What was so different on the ship?”
“As I said, I was worried about leaving my family behind. I was also a little lonely. It was then that I learned to always be positive. What is the point of complaining anyway?! I also met a friend and have remained friends with him all these years. That my dear is the secret to good health!”
Stay positive and have a good friend! It is the surest way to keep your body healthy!
Lesson 2: The Importance of Survival
Later in this visit, my great-uncle shared more about his having to travel from Wales to South Africa. It was the time of a depression in England. He traveled to South Africa as a young teenager in order to have the opportunity to work and earn. When he was just 16 years old, World War I broke out. Without hesitation, he signed up to fight with the South African army.
Joining the army met a few of his goals. Firstly, it enabled him to have housing and food, since he was finding it difficult to secure suitable work at his young age. He also had strong beliefs and was against what was happening in the war. Signing up met a number of his goals for self-preservation and survival.
He went on to become one of the last survivors of the battle of Delville Wood. His only reason for not signing up at the time of World War II was due to an injury that occurred during the first war. Though I asked him about the injury, he brushed it off as a simple injury to his arm, nothing to complain about. At least… not for him. It was nothing to stop him working his entire life. But it did prevent him from fighting further when WWII began.
Survival – valuing it means opening the opportunity to appreciating a long life.
Lesson 3: A Good Sense of Humour.
I visited my great-uncle and his son in Florida when he was 99. It was the fourth of July – a most appropriate time for celebration! We went out for a meal! While contemplating our choice of meal from the menu, my cousin offered to order for his father. He thought this to be a sign of respect to his father – an act of kindness perhaps. My great-uncle would not have it. With a twinkle in his eye he stated:
“It is independence day you know! I can do this myself!”
Later that evening he shared with me his belief that maintaining a good sense of humour was a key to living a long, healthy and fulfilling life. He must have been right!
Lesson 4: The Greatest Event in His 100 Years in This World.
The next day, we enjoyed a boat trip down a certain river. Always enjoying a talk with my great-uncle, I sat myself beside him, eager for the next pearl of wisdom that he would share! I asked him, “Uncle Joe, in your close to 100 years in this world, what is the number one, or top three or even top ten events or advances in the world that you admire the most? What has been the greatest development during your lifetime?” After all he was just a few months shy of his 100th birthday. Having an older relative approach 100 years is truly inspiring, I could hardly wait to hear what he had to share.
Awaiting his reply, I anticipated he would say something about the progress of the motor car. Perhaps he would say something regarding the advances in technology. He might even say something about the changes in healthcare. But with all the myriad choices anyone could possibly think up, my uncle could think of only one event that stood out in his entire life… That event was the establishment of the State of Israel! My uncle insisted that this made everything in his life worthwhile! It put into perspective his having to leave his parents and other relatives in Wales.
Most importantly, it meant continuity of the Jewish nation. This, in spite of there being a World War I and a World War II. He had outlived both wars and was proud to know that Israel was now a homeland to the Jewish people!
Having a homeland can surely be a greatest event in all our lives – giving us the hope and opportunity for longer more blessed lives.
Lesson 5: Being Careful With One’s Words
As I mentioned, I always enjoyed spending time with this great uncle. He was gentle and soft spoken. I never heard him get angry, complain or raise his voice. I do not remember his talking about others, unless there was an important reason to do so. He was often content to sit quietly but always had pearls of wisdom to share when one engaged him in conversation.
Being careful with one’s words and how one speaks to others was a very powerful lesson. This one was mostly shared by spending time with Uncle Joe. The famous teaching from Psalms (34:13-14) would suit him well. “Who is a man who desires long life – guard your tongue from speaking evil.”
My uncle had lived his life as a traditional Jew. He had wonderful relationships with his wife, son, grandchildren and extended family – probably another important lesson for all who strive to merit long lives.
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Uncle Joe, November 19, 1897 – February 1998, lived to a little over 100 years old! A long, happy, fulfilled life with so much to teach to others. One who lives so long must certainly hold some magic keys in understanding how to live life. These are just 5 of the of the lessons I learned from this inspiring older relative.